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MGT WALL OF FAME
(FOR TIER THREE AND HIGHER)
Dan Brenic was born, like America and and the very concept of freedom itself, in Pennsylvania. When he turned thirteen and began his Trials of Ascension (the rituals that every pubescent Pennsylvanian lad must perform in order to become a man and also get a coupon for a free bag of Middleswarth potato chips), he managed to outshine all of his peers and attain the most coveted badge of honor in the land: a Yakuza-style full body tattoo of Rocky Balboa punching the Liberty Bell. It goes without saying that he quickly rose to prominence as a leader of renown among the young patriotic thugs who held him in awe. With the British Empire no more, these days you can find him co-hosting the Netflix 'N Swill podcast. A well-deserved quiet and contemplative life, to be sure... though he does sink the occasional English frigate just to remind 'em that he's still around.
Drew Hallum is an entity of great complexity. While most would consider him to be a wonderful and generous human being, those people are dead wrong! I mean, not about the first part, obviously. He's one of the nicest fellows on the planet! He's just not human. Fun fact: Drew actually belongs to the ancient race of Skal-dvergr, or Mug Dwarves. However, unlike his curmudgeonly kin, he doesn't jealously guard his collection of mugs, cups, and other drinking vessels. Nay, he displays them openly and without reservation, and is always willing to freely speak of them and their histories. The bards say that if you fill a mug with bull's blood (or coffee or Dr. Pepper, whatever's most conveniently at hand), and speak thrice his name while gazing at your own reflection within the murky depths, Drew will appear and totally be down for a board game or whatever. You'll probably lose, but the affable skal-dvergr is gracious in victory and won't even take your soul or anything!
Thomas Howeth (Anglo-Saxon for Rock-Biter) currently hangs his sizable hat in some absurd fantasy realm called "Maryland." When he actually enters the Earth plane he splits his time between hosting a podcast about some obscure 80's movie and training a cherubic little Padawan that looks suspiciously like a three foot tall version of himself. Perhaps someday master and apprentice will take over "Maryland" (seriously, that doesn't even sound like a real place), but for now he's content just to enjoy earth's cinema. And delicious lithosphere. Pop on over to the Neverending Minute and say hi! He won't bite! You know, unless you're a rock. Probably better to go do literally anything else if you're a rock.
Steve and Izzy are your typical north-central Californians. They live in a gem-filled Cave of Wonder, emerging daily to watch movies and tend to their majestic unicorn herd. If you haven't tried their artisanal unicorn mare's milk cheese (available at Whole Foods or simply by wishing super hard for it during a meteor shower), you really should! Provided, of course, you have a designated driver or aren't going anywhere for like ten hours, because that shit is basically the magical horse version of LSD. Fantastic on crackers, though. They also have a podcast called Everything I Learned From Movies, so pop over and give them a shout! You might learn something too!
The myth, the legend: Stephen "Kobayashi Maru" Galindo. Why do we call him that? Because the man simply can't be beat. They say that when Stephen was born, the sky parted and for exactly seven minutes it rained a delicious mixture of Guinness and 18 year Glenfiddich. The subsequent revelry and rejoicing ultimately ended in the destruction of several small towns in central California... but most folks agree that it was a reasonable price to pay for the coming of the Galindo. Fun fact: when he's not noodlin' around on the guitar, Stephen extracts minerals from the earth's crust WITH HIS BARE HANDS. Like a freakin' BOSS. Noted chaotician Ian Malcolm once remarked that when Stephen Galindo thrusts his mighty fists into the ground in Kern County, there's an apocalypse in Malaysia or some shit.